🌅 Easties Daily Schedule Template

For the Eastern Time Zone's Most Productive Professionals™

Morning Routine

9:00 AM

• [ ] Open laptop with intense sense of purpose
• [ ] Reorganize desktop icons by color gradient

9:15 AM

• [ ] Check Slack 47 times in succession
• [ ] Update your status to "🎯 Deep Work Mode" (while actually scrolling Twitter)

9:30 AM

• [ ] Create a new Google Doc titled "Ideas" and stare at blank page
• [ ] Research if standing desks are actually worth it (again)

9:45 AM

• [ ] Contemplate whether you should learn Notion formulas
• [ ] Rearrange your bookmarks bar alphabetically, then by frequency of use, then back to alphabetically

⭐ 10:00 AM - Send Breakfast Emoji ⭐

• [ ] CRITICAL TASK: Send breakfast emoji to team channel

10:15 AM

• [ ] Screenshot your to-do list and add it to a "Productivity" Pinterest board
• [ ] Update LinkedIn headline with more buzzwords

10:30 AM

• [ ] Create elaborate system for tracking tasks instead of doing tasks
• [ ] Deep dive into ergonomic mouse reviews on Reddit

11:00 AM

• [ ] Audit all your browser extensions (keep all of them)
• [ ] Watch "10 Productivity Hacks" video on YouTube, get distracted by algorithm

11:30 AM

• [ ] Color-code your calendar based on "energy levels"
• [ ] Research mechanical keyboards for "focus improvement"
• [ ] Begin drafting email, save as draft, never send

⭐ 12:00 PM - 2 Hour Lunch ⭐

• [ ] Take a well-deserved 2-hour lunch break
• [ ] (Optional: Actually eat food)

2:00 PM

• [ ] Return from lunch and immediately check if anyone noticed you were gone
• [ ] Reorganize your Notion workspace using a new template system
• [ ] Create tags for your tags

2:20 PM

• [ ] Debate whether to use ☑️ or ✅ for checkboxes
• [ ] Optimize your morning routine... for tomorrow

2:40 PM

• [ ] Update your "Personal Wiki" with information you'll never reference
• [ ] Clean up Downloads folder by creating more subfolders

⭐ 3:00 PM - Bother Tomathon ⭐

• [ ] Send Tomathon at least 7 messages about something that could be one message

3:15 PM

• [ ] Create a comprehensive list of things you should be doing
• [ ] Feel overwhelmed by the list, make tea instead

3:30 PM

• [ ] Adjust monitor brightness by 2%
• [ ] Research whether blue light glasses actually work
• [ ] Order blue light glasses

3:45 PM

• [ ] Archive emails from 2019 one by one
• [ ] Build a Spotify playlist for "Deep Focus" (spend 40 minutes on this)

4:00 PM

• [ ] Update your email signature with a new inspirational quote
• [ ] Check if there are any new Notion templates you should migrate to

4:15 PM

• [ ] Screenshot interesting tweets to "read later"
• [ ] Organize screenshots into folders (never look at them again)

⭐ 4:30 PM - Gotta Go Make Tacos ⭐

• [ ] Begin taco preparation ritual

4:35 PM

• [ ] Set Slack status to "Stepping away" with taco emoji
• [ ] Take a screenshot of your task completion rate (12%)

4:45 PM

• [ ] Plan tomorrow's to-do list in excruciating detail
• [ ] Get distracted thinking about weekend

⭐ 4:59 PM - Wish Coworkers a Good Night ⭐

• [ ] Send heartfelt goodnight messages as if you'll never see them again

5:00 PM

• [ ] Actually close laptop
• [ ] JK, reopen to check one more thing

7:00 PM

• [ ] Think about work
• [ ] Think about NOT thinking about work

9:00 PM

• [ ] Check Slack "just in case"
• [ ] Respond to emails to look productive across time zones

11:00 PM

• [ ] Have brilliant idea, open laptop to write it down
• [ ] Forget idea, browse random websites instead

11:30 PM

• [ ] Suddenly remember something from 3 PM
• [ ] Decide it can wait until tomorrow (it cannot)

⭐ 11:48 PM - Write Scathing Review of Alain ⭐

• [ ] Initiate conversation with Alain
• [ ] Begin composing devastating critique of Alain's methodology/existence
• [ ] Include at least 3 passive-aggressive compliments
• [ ] CC everyone except Alain, then remember to actually include Alain

11:59 PM

• [ ] Feel guilty about Alain email
• [ ] Schedule send for 6 AM to establish dominance

12:00 AM

• [ ] Regret everything
• [ ] Plan to be more productive tomorrow
• [ ] (Narrator: They were not more productive tomorrow)

📊 Daily Metrics

• Breakfast Emojis Sent: _
• Times Bothered Tomathon: _
• Tacos Made: _
• Alains Scorched: _
• Actual Work Completed: Unclear
• Productivity Articles Read About Being Productive: _

💭 Reflection Questions

1. Did I send the breakfast emoji on time?
2. Was lunch long enough?
3. Did Tomathon respond to my bothering?
4. Were the tacos worth it?
5. Will Alain ever recover?

Remember: The key to success is looking busy while accomplishing the bare minimum! 🎯

"Work smarter, not harder" - Someone who definitely wasn't an Eastie